Imma Wild Boar

i am so not in a good mood. i wanna flip my table, which is impossible. i wanna flip everything i saw. i am literally a wild boar now... inside. outside i was like... "hey hey look at me.. i'm so damn happy now." i guess that is why he called me complicated. heuuuwww.. (¬_¬)ﾉ

i am so unproductive today... i know... i know! u don't have to mention it. i know the fact that i keep saying i am busy. but today i am not. i am not... because.. err... just because i am not.. take it as a reason won't u? huh...（▼へ▼メ）

a brief activities of mine today:

1. off from bed... bath... online...
2. spazzing zhang yixing a.k.a lay from exo-m... the whole day. since 1 pm till 5 pm. i'm on tumblr also on youtube. bitch please. i don't care what u think.
3. i'm on twitter. not to forget facebook... i shared lots of meme. sarcasm.. and no one understand me. that is why i'm on tumblr & youtube with yixing. lol... /retarded/
4. i didn't take my lunch btw. great? hungry? nahhhh.... yixing is more important to me. 
5. at 6 pm, i go to cafe, to have my dinner... it is not that i dined there. my room is more comfortable. 
6. i watched Niini no Koto wo Wasurenaide (while eating)... and i cried... a lot... A DAMN RIVER! damn it! ryo is seriously a good actor... then, i reblog some of the movie scene on tumblr. huhuhu... since i like it very much.  
7. then... i confessed.. that i haven't watch One Liter of Tears on twitter, because i don't dare to cry. I swear if i know Niini no Koto wo Wasurenaide is a sad story... I will never watch it... or touch it. serious talk here guys... i hate crying because of movie or drama. 
8. and the confession reminds me of oyaji... fck it! he said he were touched & cried over One Liter of Tears. he didn't talk to me though, he somehow exchange drama with my friend. J-drama & K-drama. u know i can always grab that chance to be close to him, because i'm a j-drama & k-drama addict... but i never. because i had a boyfriend during that time, and i tried to keep my faith.. but... crap! 
9. since i have a presentation tomorrow. i study a bit.. and prepare my slide... 
10. but then... i'm on facebook and noticed this 2012 Year in Review.. i clicked on it. and nothing interested. and that leads me to see my old archive... through Archivebook huhu... and... there u go. i get depressed by that. seriously... to see my posts which related to my ex boyfriend... to see posts about oyaji. 
11. i noticed that oyaji used to likes & commented on most of my posts. he especially commented a lot on posts that relate to him. i don't know how he know that. but he... asdfghjkl; i'm done!
12. and since then i've become this moody... this crazy.. i don't even talk much to my cousin who came here to print her presentation. i'm just not in the mood. and i post a lot about it on my alternate facebook. huhuhuhuhuhu... 
13. and i am on my period time now guys. fyi.... 
14. caffeine by yoseob is on replay... from 12 am till now... yeah~

i wanna told u guys about something related to notes 11... 

• i once posted "i hate to see ur name.." i was referring to oyaji, because that time his name keep appearing on my notification, my inbox, my sidebar, pages suggestion and so... and surprisingly... he commented on that post, with this "me? ToT" i was like.. how i know? how come u can detect it? how? and i told him, that i am not referring to him.
• there is time on time i posted "oh really? i don't think that he will miss me." because i saw this picture and i even posted it on my blog... here... and he leave a comment there "did u talk to urself again weirdo?" i remembered that i yelled at the moment i saw him leave a comment on that post. i was like... i posted more than 1 status on that day.. and why u like the other and only commented on this post? huhuhu... and he called me weirdo... T__T reading those comments make me miss the time even
• he cheer me up tell me ganbatte because i was complaining about how i miss my hometown at the moment. with a smiley... i am totally fall for him. duhhh...
• i was worried... because he doesn't get resident here. and he called me silly for that. actually, i never told him that i am worried of him. i express it in a way like asking him question, are u ok, did u manage to find a place to stay... and so. and he replied "don't worry silly, i'll find it somehow... :) night."

to me... that is not how u treat a girl as ur friend when u actually want to stay as friend with her... to me he is flirting more than trying to be a friend. i didn't know if guys like this really do exist. but my bros (i mean my boy friends) are not like this. seriously i know how to differentiate.

there are so many things that happen between me & oyaji. though it is not physically, but it is on text... chat and so... after all that is the only way we both can contacted each other. oh yeah, so many things happen & lots of talks occurred, and i can't share it with u guys. because... it is just... a lot. yeah.. a lot.

thus... it is hard for me to move on. i don't even think about moving on... seriously. i did only because my friend told me so... and that was before they saw oyaji. now, they are not encouraging me to move on, ever since they saw oyaji. huhuhu... why? i don't know. u better ask them why. lol. and i don't know what should i do.. i don't give up on trying to move on. i'm still trying.. haha!

oh... i just noticed that i am actually depressed because i saw our old conversation... duh... morning guys... 

sorry for ranting about this bastard again. i'm bored.