What is love?

what is love? i don't get it. i think i can figure it out when i have someone by my side. someone that love me, someone that i thought i love him. but idk... if i love him, why does i feel empty? why i can't consider seeing him, meeting him is a date? i wanted to bring him to the cinema, he reject. i wanted to take picture with him he reject. he reject me a lot of time. and i really hate it. i know the fact that he can't see but for me that is not the problem for us to do that. i want to have a normal relationship. i have a lot of things that i want to do with my boyfriend. but he literally reject all my wishes. what should i do? am i actually jealous of the couple who can go out happily, take picture, movies... being lead where to go. i would like someone lead my life, what i mean is, i want to be serious with someone who can decide on anything. like where to go, what is the planning. what should we do on that day. and etc... i tried my hard not to care about all the things, but in the end, i actually really care about that. did i tried to looks noble in others eyes? am i actually a bad person? taking advantage of someone who can't see? am i too selfish to care about the unimportant things in relationship? i can't help it but to see those things as important aspect in a relationship. if i am someone faithful, i don't think i can have a crush on someone? is it normal to have a crush on someone when actually u had a boyfriend?